DRAMA
O.C.
Bhangagarh Police Station
Bhangagarh
Guwahati-781005
Assam
December 18, 2017
Subject: LOST LENOVO MOBILE HANDSET WITH 2 SIMS (Jio and IDEA) FOUND ON THE ROAD
Sir,
Yesterday afternoon (Sunday, 17 December) - at about 3 p.m. - I found an old Lenovo mobile handset lying on the road on Lane 5, Tarun Nagar, Guwahati-781005 in front of Babyland Montessori School (run by Mr. Kallol Kirity Sinha), with two sims - Jio* and IDEA** - inside the mobile, the date on the mobile screen surprisingly being MONDAY, 28 AUGUST. Since I cannot locate the mobile owner, I am handing over the mobile to you for your kind disposal to the owner of his/her lost mobile.
Thanking you,
Yours faithfully,
Jitu Mani Barman
C/o Mr. Kishalay Sinha
House No. ..., Lane ...
Guwahati- ... [PIN CODE]
Assam
Mobile: ...
Enclosures
(Photocopies of 2 sims)
* Jio - 9101948903
** IDEA - 9553820752
FURTHER DETAILS OF THE DRAMA WILL FOLLOW...
(See "DRAMA: THE MISSING SMARTPHONE" *** below)
As a precautionary measure, I have omitted from the letter quoted above some details of My address (My House No. ..., Lane ..., the PIN CODE) and My mobile phone number to prevent the possibility of unwanted letters and phone calls from unethical s. female fans. To be fair to My female fans (if there are any), I have NEVER RECEIVED A SINGLE LETTER FROM A SINGLE FEMALE FAN - I get one or two calls in about three or four months but always from some unknown female staff of some Internet company or other. So, My dear FEMALE readers ("dear" is not to be regarded as an endearing term in the wrong sense), I thank you all from the bottom of My heart (IF I have a heart?) for ensuring A PEACEFUL ATMOSPHERE at My home so essential to the scholarly pursuits of A Great Scholar like Me.
*** DRAMA: THE MISSING SMARTPHONE
Indian Army intelligence, CIA, FBI, FSB, INTERPOL, EUROPOL, CBI, ISI, NSA, GCHQ, NASA etc. know the full details, I believe. However, I will give details online by and by for My billions of very eager and inquisitive readers. (Moral: Never trust anyone.) - G
A young Assamese boy, Jitumani জিতুমণি (he writes his formal name as Jitu Mani, not Jitumani which is more usual), who is the son of poor parents who live in a very small house near My building (which I got from My pater late Krishna); the poor boy's father is a taxi driver (probably a Uber driver) while his mother runs a small hotel for poor customers who can eat rice and freshly cooked dal and sabzi and fish fry or fish curry or boiled eggs or omelette at very low cost - although I am NOT poor like those who eat lunch at her small hotel (in Indian English, "hotel" is widely used to mean a restaurant; a "hotel" is often not an accommodation where travellers/travelers can stay temporarily for some time on payment of money for the period of their stay in the hotel), I got to know the poor Assamese family when My consort had gone to Punjab with My sister to visit her married daughter whose husband works in Punjab; during the entire period of My consort's long absence of 17-18 days, the poor Assamese family fortunately came to My rescue by daily providing Me with very inexpensive and nourishing freshly prepared lunch and supper (supper only for Me at My request; the hotel is open only for lunch). By the way, My consort often takes out food from the fridge and therefore the food is often tasteless. I have not been able to change My consort's firm habit, so I have given up trying, though I notice with pleasant surprise that when she invites her brothers & Co. to partake of food, the food which I eat along with her brothers and brothers' families, always happens to be quite tasty. (My consort is the eldest of her late parents' progeny; she is the BOSS of her 4 devoted brothers; she has no sister, thank God - what a relief, right?) I help the poor boy Jitumani who is very eager to learn: I buy help-books in Assamese medium for him and have arranged a mathematics tutor for him - a very hard-working struggling young Bihari college student, Neeraj, who has to do a lot of private tuition (he finished his B.Sc. 5th semester exam a few days ago; for three or four days just prior to his exams, I helped him with his mathematics and physics courses).
THE MISSING SMARTPHONE HANDSET
Yesterday (Monday, December 18, 2017), Jitumani came to My house at about 2 p.m. and he told Me: "Uncle, I found a mobile yesterday, and it is LOCKED, and it has two sims," and showed Me a black mobile handset. I asked Jitumani where he had found it, and he told Me he found it lying on Lane 5 of Tarun Nagar last Sunday (December 17, 2017) right in front of the children's school Babyland Montessori School which is now being run by Kallol Kirity Sinha (Raja), the only son of My late brother Kirity Sinha by his first (deceased) Assamese wife late Ranjana who was an ACS officer, eldest daughter of late Robin Choudhury, who was adviser to late Hiteswar Saikia, ex Congress Chief Minister of Assam. (A mediocre Assamese female violinist who appears on Assamese TV news channels from tIme to time looks very much like the late Ranjana - she is the late Ranjana's clone, I am pretty sure). I told the little boy Jitumani: "Cheats বিলাকে তোমাক আৰু তোমাৰ দুখীয়া মা দেউতাক ভুৱা mobile চুৰি কাণ্ডত ফচাব খুজিছে কিন্তু তুমি চিন্তা নকৰিবা কাৰণ মই CHEATS বিলাকৰ বাৰ বজাম ।" ("Cheats are trying to implicate you and your poor parents in a false mobile theft case but don't worry, I will give the cheats hell." I did not tell the innocent boy that ALIENS were behind this.) I could not find the name of the mobile anywhere on the mobile cover but the smart young boy showed Me how to find the name of the mobile: "Uncle, You have to switch off and then switch on the mobile - and the name of the mobile will appear" - indeed, when the procedure was followed, I saw that the name of the mobile did appear: LENOVO.
I told him I would go with him to Bhangagarh police station whose staff are always very friendly with Me and Jitumani would hand over the lost mobile to the police station who could later hand over the mobile to the owner of the mobile handset if he or she was able to give proof of ownership. I activated My mind into (famed detective) Sherlock Holmes mode. I asked the little boy Jitumani to give Me full details, and on the basis of the details the young boy Jitumani gave Me, I quickly reconstructed the entire sequence of events:
As Jitumani was coming by cycle from Bhangagarh toward his house in Tarun Nagar, his location was being relayed by mobile by members of the gang of cheats to other members of the gang of cheats. As his cycle was coming along Lane 5, a Uber car with passengers was coming along the SAME Lane (Lane 5) BUT FROM THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION and the car almost hit him when he came very near Babyland Montessori School and to avoid the approaching Uber car he quickly turned his bicycle and got down from his cycle on the side of the road near Babyland Montessori School, and then saw the black Lenovo smartphone lying upside down on the road (a passenger sitting in the back seat of the Uber car must have quickly thrown out the mobile handset from the car window) - Jitumani picked it up, and when he stood up with the black mobile in his hand, he saw that Shankar (Raja's tenant) was standing a few feet away and was watching and staring at him - when Jitumani reached his house in a minute or so (his ramshackle house is very near My nephew Kallol Kirity Sinha/Raja's house cum Babyland Montessori School), Shankar who was followed him reached his house to buy something from their tiny shop. I wondered if the plan was that Shankar would be a witness of the concocted "theft" of the "missing" mobile being stolen before his eyes when the "lost" mobile handset got "located" VERY SOON by means of "modern technology". I REALIZED THAT URGENCY WAS THE NAME OF THE GAME because I was SURE that the ALIEN SCOUNDRELS must have already filed an F.I.R. (First Information Report) at Bhangagarh Police Station reporting the "MISSING" mobile - BUT I WAS GOING TO FRUSTRATE AND BLAST THE CUNNING PLAN DEVISED BY THE GANG OF ALIEN CHEATS - BY HANDING OVER THE "LOST" MOBILE TO THE POLICE BEFORE THE ALIEN CHEATS HAD TIME TO FALSELY ACCUSE INNOCENT Jitumani OF "STEALING" THAT MOBILE - THIS WOULD BE A SHOCKING BOLT FROM THE BLUE FOR THE ALIEN CHEATS - A TERRIFYING SHOCK FOR THE ALIEN SCOUNDRELS. I WAS GOING TO GIVE THE ALIEN SCOUNDRELS HELL.
Shankar is a pleasant young guy I have known for many years because he has been working for many years at the pharmacy MEGHNA MEDICAL (owned by the very polite Dr. Agarwal who works at GNRC) in Tarun Nagar at "ABC" near Rajiv Bhawan, headquarters of Congress Party of Assam, and Shankar has also been a tenant of My late brother's son Raja/Kallol Kirity Sinha for several years - Babyland Montessori School is on the ground floor (Am. first floor) of the three-storey building, Raja lives with his wife Seema and their little son on the first floor (Am. second floor), and Shankar and other tenants live on the second floor (Am. third floor). - G
I asked young Barman, who works at a mobile shop in Tarun Nagar, to find the mobile numbers of the two sims: he found the numbers:
Jio - 9101948903
IDEA - 9553820752 (Barman told Me that this mobile number belongs to a state outside Assam)
I entered in ink the two mobile numbers in the printed copy of the letter to the O/C of Bhangagarh P.S.
I got photocopies of both sides of the two sims (Jio and IDEA sims) and attached the photocopies to the letter addressed to Bhangagarh Police Station O/C.
I gave the two mobile numbers and photocopies of the two sims to the police because with additional information obtained from the mobile handset we would hand over to the police, it would be very easy for the police to bust the gang of cheats.
I quickly typed the following letter in English on My PC signed by Jitu Mani Barman (C/o Me) addressed to the O.C. of Bhangagarh Police Station, and I made several printed copies of that letter with My Canon printer, one to give to the O.C. of Bhangagarh Police Station, one as a RECEIVED copy, and others for My own future use (perhaps to give to top authorities if necessary), and Jitumani and I went to Bhangagarh police station, carrying the lost mobile handset with us.
O.C.
Bhangagarh Police Station
Bhangagarh
Guwahati-781005
Assam
December 18, 2017
Subject: LOST LENOVO MOBILE HANDSET WITH 2 SIMS (Jio and IDEA) FOUND ON THE ROAD
Sir,
Yesterday afternoon (Sunday, 17 December) - at about 3 p.m. - I found an old Lenovo mobile handset lying on the road on Lane 5, Tarun Nagar, Guwahati-781005 in front of Babyland Montessori School (run by Mr. Kallol Kirity Sinha), with two sims - Jio* and IDEA** - inside the mobile, the date on the mobile screen surprisingly being MONDAY, 28 AUGUST. Since I cannot locate the mobile owner, I am handing over the mobile to you for your kind disposal to the owner of his/her lost mobile.
Thanking you,
Yours faithfully,
Jitu Mani Barman
C/o Mr. Kishalay Sinha
House No. 10, Lane 5
Guwahati-781005
Assam
Mobile: 8135818039
Enclosures
(Photocopies of 2 sims)
* Jio - 9101948903
** IDEA - 9553820752
[I have given My complete address and My mobile number with the confident hope that no unethical s. female will try to contact Me in the unethical sense. If any female ever tries to contact Me, of course I will be very polite - and frustratingly and brutally distant and unresponsive, so why would any s. female want to wreck her fragile unethical heart? - G]
The first police officer in khaki police uniform I met at Bhangagarh Police Station (near Gauhati [Guwahati] Medical College & Hospital/GMC) yesterday (on 18th December, Monday) at about 3.30 p.m. was a very polite and courteous young police officer, Mr. Islam, who offered Me a seat. When I explained to him that we had come to Bhangagarh police station to hand over a lost mobile that the young shorts/"half-pant"-wearing Jitumani (standing near Me) had found on the previous afternoon (on 17th December, Sunday), he called another equally polite and courteous police officer, Mr. Basumatari, who seemed senior to Mr. Islam, and sat on the chair earlier occupied by Mr. Islam who explained to him that we had come to hand over a "missing" mobile. Mr. Basumatari told Me that a very worried mother and daughter had come to the police station coz the daughter had lost her mobile and she had filed an F.I.R. to report that she had lost her mobile, and that she would offer A BIG REWARD to anyone who could find her "missing" mobile. Mr. Basumatari then kept searching through papers on a tray (I wondered what he was looking for) and he quickly took out from the tray of papers a hand-written missing report in slanting lines written in English in very poor handwriting. What surprised Me when I saw the letter was that House No. 9 which was given as her home address in Tarun Nagar was My neighbour Mr. Deb's house - which was confirmed when I saw that the girl's name was Miss Deb (I think she is unmarried) and her guardian's name was her mother Mrs. Deb, and her Jio and IDEA numbers she stated in the F.I.R. (First Information Report) were the SAME AS the Jio and IDEA numbers STATED in the letter submitted to O/C of Bhangagarh Police Station by JItumani (Jitu Mani Barman, C/o Kishalay Sinha)! Mr. Basumatari called Miss Deb and told her that her mobile had been recovered and Someone known to them (that is, Me, Kishalay Sinha [G]) was waiting at the police station, and he told Miss Deb to come to the police station immediately. Excited mother and daughter arrived at the police station very fast in a Uber car in a few minutes. (I have known Mr. Deb for many years; Mr. Deb has been an SBI/State Bank of India employee for many years; his wife Mrs. Deb is an employee of Central Bank of India, Bhangagarh branch, Guwahati - 781005; they came to their newly constructed house only about a year ago. I did not see their young daughter Miss Deb before, who stays in Hyderabad pursuing a linguistics course at a well-known linguistics institute in Hyderabad, I was told. I only saw Miss Deb yesterday - at the police station.)
Miss Deb, filled with intense excitement and great joy, breezily entered the Bhangagarh police station office where we were seated. (There was no extra chair and she was standing near us like Jitumani. Since I was very senior to her, and since I am never impressed by any female, I did not think of being gallant and giving up My chair. Why should I? - G) She thanked Jitumani profusely and wanted to offer him a REWARD which he refused to take but she kept on insisting and gave him something. (I later asked Jitumani how much REWARD Miss Deb gave him - 100 rupees, Jitumani told Me.) Miss Deb told Me that we could go back to Tarun Nagar in the rented Uber car in which her mom Mrs. Deb sitting in the back seat was waiting outside the police station. I agreed. I saw that Mrs. Deb sat in the back near the right door, Miss Deb would sit in the middle, so I told Jitumani to sit next to her and near the left door, and I sat in the front seat near the Uber driver. I think I must have shaken hands very warmly with both the police officers Mr. Basumatari and Mr. Islam inside the police station office room. (I noticed that a very quiet female office staff was working very silently at another table in the office room.) As we left Bhangagarh Police Station, I thanked Mr. Basumatari and Mr. Islam both and gave each of them a packet of 5-rupee ball pens. ("The pen is mightier than the sword.") I had bought many such packets from My old friend Barua, owner of SKB studio at Bhangagarh. (I got both sides of the Jio and IDEA sims xeroxed/photocopied by a charming gal staff of Barua's shop; I attached the photocopies of JIO sim and IDEA sim to the letter signed by Jitu Mani Barman addressed to the O/C, Bhangagarh Police Station, Bhangagarh, Guwahati-781005, Assam.) When the Uber car came to a halt near our houses, Jitumani and I got down from the car and I started moving toward Jitumani's poor house with Jitumani because I knew that if I did NOT go with him and did not explain to his anxious poor mother what had actually happened, his poor mother would think that her naughty son had sold the mobile and would scold him angrily and give him a good beating, not believing his true story. I noticed to My surprise that Miss Deb was NOT approaching the house of poor Jitumani and was instead preparing to go with her mom to their House No. 9. This was very discourteous of her. Suppressing My violent anger, I called Miss Deb aloud and told her to come forward and meet Jitumani's mother. She complied with My (violent) order and met Jitumani's anxious mother, the young Jitumani the "hero" sitting quietly near his mother. When Miss Deb was thanking Jitumani's mother, I told the poor worried mother of Jitumani VERY LOUDLY in Assamese so the Bong female Miss Deb would hear: "তোমাৰ লৰাক - আৰু তোমালোক দুখীয়া মাক বাপেকক - চয়তান বিলাকে তোমালোকক "mobile চোৰ" বুলি জেইলত (JAIL) ভৰাব খুজিছিল ।"
Miss Deb told Me that she felt so relieved because she had booked her plane ticket [to Hyderabad ?] online and that many vital documents were stored in her Gmail account in that mobile, and that she had blocked her Jio sim and had got a new Jio sim on Monday (but she told Me nothing about blocking her IDEA sim nor getting a new IDEA sim; I wondered why she neglected the IDEA sim). I found out and feel very surprised that on Sunday, 17th December, Mrs. Deb and her daughter Miss Deb, as they were returning from their visit to Kakaknya temple by a rented Uber and had reached Tarun Nagar, they made their Uber car reach their House No. 9 via a needlessly long route - instead of coming from "ABC" via Tarun Nagar Main Lane and turning left and moving along Lane 5 to quickly reach their House No. 9 on Lane, their car moved along a needlessly (?) much longer route - via Lane 2, then Lane 6, then Lane 5 - IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION TO JITUMANI MOVING ON HIS BICYCLE ALONG LANE 5 when Jitumani veered his cycle to the left to avoid collision with the Uber car and jumped down from his cycle in front of Babyland Montessori School - when he saw and picked up the "missing" mobile lying on the road as the Uber car crossed him, Shankar watching him from just a few feet away and then quickly following him to the tiny shop run by his mother to buy something from their shop. I find this very intriguing.
BUT I KEEP WONDERING VERY SERIOUSLY about something I did not ask her but which the police and CBI and Indian Army intelligence can INVESTIGATE - WHY the Lenovo handset of a very smart and modern Net-savvy educated girl who uses her smartphone to book plane tickets ONLINE and uses Gmail to store all her vital documents FAILED TO KEEP THE DATE ON HER MOBILE SCREEN UP-TO-DATE: I noticed that the DATE on the screen of her locked "lost" mobile was MONDAY, 28 AUGUST.
Kishalay Sinha [G] Tuesday, December 19, 2017
